Just
before dawn, I heard cardinal song outside my window. The clear trill was coming from the trees
surrounding the pool. I pictured the red
bird in the rain-wet trees, on this unusually cool Texas May morning. But the bird appearing in my mind’s eye was
not a cardinal. I was my familiar
friend, the mockingbird.
My
scientist’s brain went into testing and verification mode: Indeed, we have many more mockingbirds than
cardinals in the poolside landscape.
There is one particularly vocal fellow who frequents the tree outside my
bedroom window. And as I listened, I
heard other types of bird songs coming from the same apparent spot. I concluded: Indeed, it must have been a
mockingbird.
I
couldn’t help but wonder how I knew, before thinking it out, that the song I
heard was an imitation of the real cardinal’s song. I bet if I heard a recording of the two, I
could not discern a difference. Even
real birds are sometimes fooled by the mockingbird’s song. Yet, intuition gave me a clear knowing. The same knowing took my mind a while to reach.
The
voice that directs my actions and decisions is a lot like this morning’s bird
songs.
My ego,
my small self, is a mockingbird. It sings
songs that help me to establish and defend my “territory” (who I think I
am). But in Reality, those songs are
only reflections, projections and imitations.
They serve a temporary purpose, but do not reveal who I am at my core,
nor help me fulfill my real mission in life.
When I listen to the voice of my
small self, at best, I am listening to an echo of the Truth. That voice may even direct me toward actions
that are helpful and generous. But in
the end, such actions frequently leave me feeling empty, exhausted or used.
Through
the Grace of intuition, or through the conscious humility of setting aside my
own small-self-will, I can hear the voice of my larger Self. This Self lives in communion with all of
creation, and maintains a connection to the eternal force I often think of as
God. Actions taken at the urging of this
voice have a different energy than those directed by the small self. This is true even when the actions are
externally indistinguishable from those fueled by the ego. Coming from a place of infinite connection
and love, I am energized, not depleted.
Even when I inevitably fail to perform perfectly, these actions create
good.
The
mockingbird sang to me an important message today. My mind, my knowledge, can lead me down some
false roads. By opening to intuition and
by practicing listening to my soul, I will be directed in the Right
direction. I will move toward wholeness.