When we can begin to appreciate ourselves, we begin automatically to accept help and support and gifts from outside sources, including others--the beginning of the end of self-reliance.
Self appreciation is not the same thing as self-aggrandizing, conceit or self-absorption. In fact, these characteristics are the opposite of true self-appreciation.
In appreciating our self, we are accepting all of who we are, warts as well as loveliness. This appreciation is a kind of change of view point that allows us to accept our self so much more fully than when we judge ourselves.
Appreciating our self is a necessary first step of humility. It is also a defense against humiliation. We begin to see and experience the value of our self in the world.
Where are all these words leading? It is going to take us to a way of being where we are able, without trepidation or fear, to share our being in the world, trusting the truth that it will be the best we are able in the moment we are giving it. Self-acceptance of our imperfections, and of those moments where we also experience perfection.
Self Reflection: How do I appreciate myself? Am I willing to accept help, support, gifts from others? Am I still hanging on to self-reliance? If so, what fears lie beneath this veneer of self-will?
Showing posts with label Being Human. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Being Human. Show all posts
Thursday, November 16, 2017
Saturday, October 21, 2017
The Essentials of Growing Humility
Attempting to grow amidst humiliation and shame, Humility will struggle to thrive.
Yet, without humility, our ability to share the fullness of
our life out in the world is thwarted . Humility is
the ability to stand tall, not with pride (which is a mask for covering shame
and humiliation), but with a willingness to be seen as who we truly are; with imperfections and the awareness we will always continue to become more of ourselves.
In the garden of our soul, shame is a tough and
bitter herb. Humiliation has thorns as sharp as those of the thistle. Pride is like the rotten trunk of a tree, easily uprooted and
blown over by the wind, crushing tender shoots under the weight of her fall.
Self Reflection: How will I nourish and tend the increase of my humility through self-care and kindness toward myself?
Thursday, October 19, 2017
Our Journey to Share Truth:Begins
"The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are."
C.G.Jung
This moon cycle leads us in the way to share Truth in the world. Our first call is to use the skills, gifts, experiences and dreams we carry within to share our truth. Our willingness to share our truth as best as we currently understand this Truth. That is all that is needed. That is enough. More will be shared as is needed-we need only be open to receive. Our understanding of the Truth of our being grows toward fullness only when we become willing to share our truth as it is in the now.
Self Reflection: I claim and move in the fullness of who I am,with humility, so that I do not shame or humiliate others.
Saturday, June 17, 2017
The Integrity and Humility of Speaking a Hard Truth
Carolyn shares: There are so many times when it would be easier to not speak a truth.
It's easy to keep silent when someone else is blamed for something I did. I remember the time my grandson was yelled at by his father for moving the dog's water bowl. The little guy began to cry. I would have liked to slink into a corner myself and be quiet about my deed, not wanting the wrath of my stepson, who likes things orderly, have one more thing I did that was aggravated him. But I acknowledge my deed.
It's easy to tell a different story when we forget, are absent minded and we have inconvenienced or disappointed another person. There was the time I spaced on my agreement to have breakfast with a friend. I didn't forget. It was on my calendar, but when I checked, I couldn't connect the name to any event. When my friend finally called, I really didn't want her to know why I was not there. I thought about not picking up the phone. But I answered and spoke the truth of my error.
How about going for a medical check-up and are asked to fill out the 'patient information form'. The part where they ask how much alcohol or coffee is consumed and how often. I have fudged on that one. I never want to admit I smoked in college, so I have left that off, too. Not telling the truth about these things harmed me, no one else.
I have a lot of stories like this. I imagine most readers do. My first couple vignettes may make me look somewhat saintly in my misspoken words, but I am hardly so! There are many times I did not speak my truth, and the lie or silence was perceived as the truth for a long time. Some of my brushes with keeping a lie as the face of truth were much worse, had bigger consequences than others. I won't tell those stories here! Since I have been on this path of Truth, I have spoken up about most of them to the people they need spoken to. In doing so I have suffered the loss of some relationships. Thankfully, most of the time, my amends were received with appreciation for my willingness to set things right.
I would like to be impeccable with my words. It's a process, I am definitely not perfect. Yet, I have committed to living the Cycles of Truth as part of my path. Now, I notice times when I am going to say something and the words stick in my throat. Often when I check myself, I'm getting some 'guidance' on speaking truth.
Self Reflection: Not Speaking Truth harms me the most. What are the areas of my life where I am inclined to hedge my truth?
It's easy to keep silent when someone else is blamed for something I did. I remember the time my grandson was yelled at by his father for moving the dog's water bowl. The little guy began to cry. I would have liked to slink into a corner myself and be quiet about my deed, not wanting the wrath of my stepson, who likes things orderly, have one more thing I did that was aggravated him. But I acknowledge my deed.
It's easy to tell a different story when we forget, are absent minded and we have inconvenienced or disappointed another person. There was the time I spaced on my agreement to have breakfast with a friend. I didn't forget. It was on my calendar, but when I checked, I couldn't connect the name to any event. When my friend finally called, I really didn't want her to know why I was not there. I thought about not picking up the phone. But I answered and spoke the truth of my error.
How about going for a medical check-up and are asked to fill out the 'patient information form'. The part where they ask how much alcohol or coffee is consumed and how often. I have fudged on that one. I never want to admit I smoked in college, so I have left that off, too. Not telling the truth about these things harmed me, no one else.
I have a lot of stories like this. I imagine most readers do. My first couple vignettes may make me look somewhat saintly in my misspoken words, but I am hardly so! There are many times I did not speak my truth, and the lie or silence was perceived as the truth for a long time. Some of my brushes with keeping a lie as the face of truth were much worse, had bigger consequences than others. I won't tell those stories here! Since I have been on this path of Truth, I have spoken up about most of them to the people they need spoken to. In doing so I have suffered the loss of some relationships. Thankfully, most of the time, my amends were received with appreciation for my willingness to set things right.
I would like to be impeccable with my words. It's a process, I am definitely not perfect. Yet, I have committed to living the Cycles of Truth as part of my path. Now, I notice times when I am going to say something and the words stick in my throat. Often when I check myself, I'm getting some 'guidance' on speaking truth.
Self Reflection: Not Speaking Truth harms me the most. What are the areas of my life where I am inclined to hedge my truth?
Monday, June 12, 2017
What Part of Me is Speaking and is it Really Truth, Part 2
What is it we want others to hear when we speak?
How do we know that what we are saying is what we really want others to hear?
What part of our personality/our person is doing the speaking?
Once we come to recognize our different voices of our personality, or to have some awareness of their history, we will have a more conscious choice about which voice speaks.
What speaking truth means in each of our lives will be different from person to person for we all have our own life experiences which determine our perceptions and beliefs. In difficult conversations, such as the example shared in yesterday's post having awareness of our own personal histories and biases is a giant step toward speaking a truth that causes no harm and honors the other's truth, even when that truth is at odds with ours.
How do we do this?
First, connect with the way in which we respect and have gratitude for the person with whom we are speaking, or may have conflict. Gratitude or respect supports our speaking in a less defended way.
Second, offer a prayer and set an intention for the conversation.
Third, review your motives. Take time to release pent-up anxiety, fears, demands through talking with an unbiased friend.
Next, acknowledge your triggers and biases; align with intention for an outcome with the highest good for all-yourself included.
Finally, look for the lesson this opportunity offers for you too become a being whose life is in Truth.
Self Reflection: It is my choice to reflect upon, ignore or twist life's lessons.
Once we come to recognize our different voices of our personality, or to have some awareness of their history, we will have a more conscious choice about which voice speaks.
What speaking truth means in each of our lives will be different from person to person for we all have our own life experiences which determine our perceptions and beliefs. In difficult conversations, such as the example shared in yesterday's post having awareness of our own personal histories and biases is a giant step toward speaking a truth that causes no harm and honors the other's truth, even when that truth is at odds with ours.
How do we do this?
First, connect with the way in which we respect and have gratitude for the person with whom we are speaking, or may have conflict. Gratitude or respect supports our speaking in a less defended way.
Second, offer a prayer and set an intention for the conversation.
Third, review your motives. Take time to release pent-up anxiety, fears, demands through talking with an unbiased friend.
Next, acknowledge your triggers and biases; align with intention for an outcome with the highest good for all-yourself included.
Finally, look for the lesson this opportunity offers for you too become a being whose life is in Truth.
Self Reflection: It is my choice to reflect upon, ignore or twist life's lessons.
Tuesday, April 18, 2017
From Seeming Opposites, We See the Truth of Our Connection
In our conscious choice to See Truth, we see the contradictions between what we believe to be true and our actual experience of truth we now encounter. It is our quest for truth, and our willingness to see(k) Truth, that brings us this gift of clarity. Our conflicts and challenges become doorways leading us to compassion, and to become who we are born to be.
We begin to see and know the bigger Truth of our wondrous Self (and truly, we are created wondrous).
We consciously act as the Self we are now discovering.
We begin to be visible in the world, to those around us.
One of the results of stepping more fully and truthfully into our lives is that, we become more visible to others, and people see us differently than they have before.
[Carolyn's personal comment: Since I have begun working with the Truth Cycles and consciously trying to apply them in my daily life, it is not unusual for someone I have not seen for a while to comment that I seem somehow different to them, changed. I take this as a good thing!]
But more important than how we are seen, is that we begin to see others differently. We have more compassion, and a broader and deeper understanding of what we see in the world around us. We are able to humbly acknowledge the limits of our ability to know others' truth. We are able to allow them more space for their journey and in doing so, we have more space for our own.
Self Reflection: As I stay on my path and continue to see(k) truth, I change, others change, confirming we are all connected.
We begin to see and know the bigger Truth of our wondrous Self (and truly, we are created wondrous).
We consciously act as the Self we are now discovering.
We begin to be visible in the world, to those around us.
One of the results of stepping more fully and truthfully into our lives is that, we become more visible to others, and people see us differently than they have before.
[Carolyn's personal comment: Since I have begun working with the Truth Cycles and consciously trying to apply them in my daily life, it is not unusual for someone I have not seen for a while to comment that I seem somehow different to them, changed. I take this as a good thing!]
But more important than how we are seen, is that we begin to see others differently. We have more compassion, and a broader and deeper understanding of what we see in the world around us. We are able to humbly acknowledge the limits of our ability to know others' truth. We are able to allow them more space for their journey and in doing so, we have more space for our own.
Self Reflection: As I stay on my path and continue to see(k) truth, I change, others change, confirming we are all connected.
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