We begin our reflection on Willingness and Will by looking at how we learned to adopt 'other people's will' as a strategy to live our life. As infants and young children, we were dependent human beings, and we learned to follow the instruction of others to be safe and secure in our life. Sometimes these 'instructions' were really demands, and not living according to the rules and dictates of our caregivers threatened our well-being.
For some of us, learning to pick up cues from others about their needs and wants, and about what of our behaviors were acceptable to others became a way of life; a pattern we have never outgrown. In fact we may have honed these skills into fine art. This way of interpreting and responding is so second nature we may not be aware we are doing it.
When we are in the grips of 'other people's will', we feel pushed around, helpless., with no or limited options, often out of control, fearful, and concerned about getting things right. We also feel stuck, dependent, confusion, and feelings of shame . We are aligned with a need for approval and acceptance as a priority in our life. This list, of course, is not nearly complete!
Self Reflection: What are times or areas of my life where I still experience some of the above mentioned states of being, emotions, feelings, thoughts and behaviors. Are there some other ways not on this list I would add where I recognize Someone else has control in my life? I can recognize this and know, by recognizing the patterns, I have begun to shift them...my willingness to Live Truth has begun.
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