To Serve Truth is to Empty Oneself to the World

Carolyn writes: This morning I saw the moon, tipped over as if she were pouring herself out onto the earth.  I wondered, "Will I ever be able to just pour myself out into the world?  Could I trust that what I poured out would be of benefit? at least not cause harm?  What would it take to move past my remaining fears (most of them have been removed-whew)?  To serve Truth as I understand Truth without self-doubt (faith now outweighs doubt) ?  I have been told be a woman wiser than me that it takes faith and practice, the heart WILL learn to open so our part of Truth pours out.

The tools for embracing all the cycles of Truth strengthens faith, builds discipline, and opens hearts to receive love.  Develop willing and skillful use of these tools,  Practice using them:

Gather a team to support your longing and purpose-- and help you be accountable.

Prayer everyday, and as often as you think of praying throughout your day. Pray when you wake in the night. Pray in the bathroom, at work, when cooking, taking a shower, when driving.  Pray always and everywhere.

Work to create an consistent time in you daily routine for contemplation.  You will begin to remember to show up at that time.  You will find that the Divine is already there.

Practice receiving help. Practice asking for help. Practice saying 'yes'.

Practice beginning again, and again.  

Carolyn's view of the morning moon
pouring herself out into the world. 

Self Reflection: I trust that with faith and practice my heart opens and my Truth pours out.

August Full Moon: An Invitation to Sit in Contemplation with (at least) One Other Person as a Precursor to Serve Truth

Archbishop Rowan Williams, former leader of the Anglican Church, told the Synod of Catholic Bishops in Rome "…contemplation is the only ultimate answer to the unreal and insane world that our financial systems and our advertising culture and our chaotic and unexamined emotions encourage us to inhabit. To learn contemplative practice is to learn what we need so as to live truthfully and honestly and lovingly." 

Carolyn's thoughts:  In many ways, when one commits to relationship with Truth, which is what this practice of living and working within these cycles is, is to be a contemplative OUT in the world, rather than inside of the walls of our room, church, institution, or other place where we can avoid the impact of other humans’ creative or destructive chaos!  What a commitment!  And to do this without burning out our lives, our inner flame, we MUST be in relationship with some others who have this same longing, this same intention, desire, vision. 

THIS IS THE REASON to gather in small groups, holding each other in the same sacred way, supporting each other’s contemplation, willingness to share their insights, and supporting their actions in the world and their self-care.  In this way we are held in good stead to Serve Truth.

Self Reflection: Today I notice how I am already able to be contemplative AND be in the world, remembering this is a practice of awareness and of service to self, other, Truth.

Questions to Ask While Waxing Toward Fullness

The Full Moon for August is tomorrow.

Stop now and take a moment--  

Ask:

“What was happening in my life at the beginning of this moon cycle?

What has come in to make my life to make it fuller-whether good, bad, lovely or ugly?

What are my victories, no matter how tiny they might seem, that illuminate of my life?

What experiences and learning do I wish to keep?

What am I willing to share out in the world?

What would I rather not have added into my life and,if given the chance would take a 'do-over' (these are called regrets)?”

Self Reflection: These words rest with me and germinate as I live in these hours moving toward the full Moon of August. To have conscious awareness of the answers is a profound step toward Serving Truth.

Frustration and Serving Truth

Not feeling good enough, smart enough, energized enough or deserving enough, is what keeps us from being able to Serve Truth; even when we ARE willing to be of service. Because these feeling-states (all those 'enough's') are not based on Truth, but rather on illusion and misconception, it is incredibly difficult to be in service of truth from this way of being.

In Michael Singer’s book 'The Surrender Experiment', he writes of his commitment to accept  whatever it is he is asked to do--even when he is in doubt about his abilities, or if the request doesn’t make sense in his logical mind.  This commitment is an act of faith; a faith which develops over time.  Having faith allows us to move past our need to be 'enough', and to serve without any need to predict the outcome.  It is an act that develops with practice.  It does not just happen. We must ask and invite it to become a part of our life.

Prayer and contemplation are key to receiving the direction we need, and to hear what 'Service to Truth' is being asked of us. 

Self Reflection:  I become aware of what weighs me down. As the full moon approaches, I begin sorting what am I willing to release my control over, and what guidance I am now willing to receive, so I may be more visible and freer to serve the world and  my true self.

Waxing Moon's Gift

The rhythm of the Waxing Moon builds energy, preparing for fullness, movement, release.  In the intention to be in service of Truth, our awareness of building to this fullness is a gift. Most people are not aware of these natural rhythms, or if they are aware of these rhythms, they are more likely to experience them as interference rather than support. Our willingness to receive this Divinely orchestrated energy, in the ebb and flow with which it comes to us, will fuel our life in a balanced and regenerative way.  The mere act of asking changes everything.  Ask for direction.  Then LISTEN WITH ALL YOUR SENSES for that direction. Then of course—follow it!

Self Reflection:  Am I aware of my natural rhythms? Do I experience them more as interference or more as support?

Tomorrow:  An alignment prayer for when we are running out the door!

Serving the Truth of Self is a Path for Self Renewal

To serve the Truth, I begin with serving self, which is NOT a form of self enslavement.

In being a servant to my own truth, I renew my being, becoming ever more of my true self, the human I came to Earth to 'be'.  The waxing moon for Serve Truth is about RENEWAL--birthing, re-birthing, healing, becoming new again.  

In this practice of  'renewal', I am reflecting, releasing, realigning, reconnecting. 

I reflect--My willingness to reflect on my life brings my to seeing in a more expanded and visionary way.

I release-- As I establish a practice of reflection, I notice my preconceived notions, beliefs and ideas about who I am and even what I do, can do, can't do. It is then possible to seek support to 'let go', to release, what is not healing or supportive for my life. 

I realign-- As I let go and release those parts that are 'not truth for me' (this is not the same thing as bad or wrong, just not who you are), I must consciously recenter in my own being. I am realigning my new awareness with the being experience myself to be. Another word for this is to ground oneself or to be centered in oneself.

I reconnect--As I realign with my self, I am connected with more of the Truth of who I am.  I am more whole. From this ongoing practice of reflecting, releasing, realigning, reconnecting. I am then able to connect and reconnect with others and in this way to Serve Truth.

Self Reflection: In this time of  'renewal', I practice reflecting, releasing, realigning, reconnecting. 

Serving Truth Requires Balance

Sara writes: To Serve Truth, I must have balance.  I cannot sustainably fulfill my calling if I do not feed all the necessary parts of my life and my self.  My list of cyclically neglected parts includes; body care (nutrition, exercise, sleep, medical), relaxation, fun, creative work, time with loved ones, meeting my commitments, financial stewardship and nurturing my business.

To have balance, I must have both awareness and discipline.  I must make conscious choices.  I must be honest with myself about the consequences of those choices.  Then, I must stay on track and follow through with my choices.  A couple years ago, it came to me that "Discipline is integrity in working clothes "Discipline is integrity in working clothes".   I am gradually learning that when I have a choice between 'doing what feels good' and 'doing what makes me feel good about myself', the latter is almost always the choice that is in alignment with my Purpose.

Self Reflection:  Do I feel the difference between 'doing what feels good' and 'doing what makes me feel good about myself'?

Strengthening and Aligning Our Internal Flame, Final Part (at least for now)

Carolyn writes:  Sara and I both shared about our ‘off day’ experiences.  From my long years of working with others, I know these kind of days happen for everyone.  Out-of-sync days occur regardless of our supposed level of ‘spiritual development’.  We can’t prevent them, and we can’t control when they occur; that’s not the point. When they come, they are an invitation to upgrade our life.  They become the backdrop for the illuminating the experience of being in sync with Divine Direction.

Self Reflection: The feeling of not being ‘good enough’ or not doing things ‘right’ are ways that my internal flame, my being, moves out of alignment with Creator.  My morning ritual-my intentional act of offering my life to Servie, restores my alignment. This practice is pure act of faith.  If I stick with it-it sticks with me. In short order, it will become my felt sense, a known internal feeling.

Strengthening and Aligning Our Internal Flame, Part 4: Discipline as Grace

Carolyn writes:
I'm writing about myself today, in first person, not assuming others experience life as I do. When I am irritable and frustrated by the limitations I see in myself,  my personal world, or other people's actions, I find my intentions and my integrity can fall to the way-side.  To continue with the metaphor of the 'wick in the lamp' (see Part 1), it is as if my wick is separated from the fuel source, or has become so fouled it can no longer maintain a flame.   

There are also times when  I am so angry or upset that I consciously shut off any experience of Grace and Divine support. I 'yank my wick out of my lamp'! And, I usually shut out human support as well, which, in my metaphor, is the 'fouled-up-wick' part.

Yet, tbecause I have a commitment to daily contemplation, even when I am pissed off, through the grace of this daily practice, I sit my bottom down on my prayer cushion. I make an attempt to name some things I am grateful for. Sometimes, I can only say I am grateful for the gift of discipline to sit when I don't want to. Sometimes I'm not even able to do that. I set my timer for five minutes, and I sit. This commitment to sit, even when I don't want to, is a movement toward alignment. It is a profound, disciplined act of loving myself.

Self Reflection: Where am I disciplined in loving myself?  Where would I like more discipline? 

Strengthening and Aligning Our Internal Flame, Part 3

From Sara’s waxing moon inspiration: “To be born again is to accept the gifts of life consciously and with humility.”

Humility and Alignment: It is unfortunate humiliation and humility sound so similar.  Humiliation is an invitation to crawl back into our hiding places; to fight for our emotional life- to struggle against being under others’ control.

To be humiliated is one of the worst feelings and experiences we can have as human beings.  It is a truly a violation of our being to our deepest core sense of self.  Most of us will do whatever we can to avoid humiliation-and a big part of that avoidance is hiding our light and our life from others.

Humility is the ability to carry, with grace, our gifts, making space for those around us to feel safe, supported, seen.  True humility allows us to be visible in our gifts and abilities, and vulnerable to others response to these gifts.  

Self Reflection:  Embracing humlilty, I carry my gifts with grace; making space for those around me to feel safe, supported, seen. Embracing humility, I, too, am safe and supported.

Strengthening and Aligning Our Internal Flame, Part 2

From Sara’s waxing moon inspiration: “To be born again is to accept the gifts of life consciously and with humility.”

To serve implies a commitment followed closely by action!  Every time I consciously commit to accepting and living/expressing/making visible/using the gifts I have, I am born again, and again and again.  New birthing of myself happens over and over.  Every time I take action, I become an updated version of ME (My Essence), closer and closer, more and more in alignment with Creator’s Vision of me. 

Humility is the vessel which has the capacity to hold the magnificence of Creator’s vision for our unique expression of life.  Doubt and mistrust limit our humility, and constrict the space available in our life to birth our vision.  

Self Reflection:  I consciously accept my gifts. I commit to live an ongoing updated version of my possibility!

Strengthening and Aligning Our Internal Flame Part 1

By internal flame, is meant one's life force, which is the energy which we bring into the world with us when we are born.  Over time, our life experiences can be like a storm battering away at the flame of a lamp.  While we cannot control the metaphoric winds and storms that threaten our flame, we can strengthen the wick of the lamp which is our life.

Our intention for living our life and our commitment to live with integrity (Truth as best as we currently understand) weave together and become like a wick, drawing up energy from Creator's unlimited source. This energy, ignited by Grace, is an ever-flowing gift of love available to all of us. 

We receive this Grace through two actions: First, through a daily practice of expressing specific and sincere gratitude (thanksgiving) and second, by asking Source (by whatever name we have for Source) for help in living our life and are consciously willing to receive help.  In other words, we establish a morning practice of gratitude prayer and contemplative petition.

Self Reflection: I align MY internal flame with the Eternal Flame of Love.

To Serve Truth is to First Love Self

Ultimately, If we are to be healthy and whole, we must love what we serve.
Otherwise, our serving will likely carry a level of resentment or resistance, and ulterior motive.
We practice Serving Truth-which is serving God/Creator/Great Mystery--by serving our the Truth of our own self first.

The more I do this work of consciously living  these cycles, year after year, I find I am called over and over to love myself more.  I find that my ability to love (hence, serve) Truth is limited to my ability to Love (not the same as indulge-darn-it!) my own being-ALL parts of me, and to serve this being that is 'me'.

It is only from this place that I am finally able to experience the immense flow of love that comes in those fleeting moments I am humbly surrendered to Serve truth.

Self Reflection:  I acknowledge the areas in my life where I love my own being. I also acknowledge where I 'indulge' my being in ways that do not serve my Truth.

Building A Reservoir of Love and Healing: Serving the Truth Within Ourselves

How each of us experience the gifts and teachings of each of the moon cycles is going to be an unique and individual experience.  Our common ground in developing a practice of contemplation, prayer and meditation.  Each of us will have our own unique expression of these practices as well. Our practice of prayer, contemplation and meditation is actually a practice of communication with Truth in all her forms.

Developing this communication generally develops over time.  Most of us will not have 'conversion' experiences like Paul of Tarsus or Buddha or Hildegard of Bingen.   It is more likely we will have times of personal struggle followed by an awareness that changes our attitudes, behaviors and beliefs. It is these series of little changes that then lead to major and sustainable shifts and ultimately regenerative transformation of different areas of our life. Over time, our entire life transforms.

Self Reflection: I begin building my reservoir by asking in prayer, contemplation, and/or  meditation what serves me most to focus on as I begin the practice of loving and healing my own being.  

Thursday Summer Blessing

Karen shares a blessing that resonates with her journey of Love Truth:

Thursday Summer Blessing

As the tree shares its gifts of fruit,
So I, too, share the gifts of me.
For in me
Is the facilitator
Of a more loving world;
In me is the catalyst
For a greater social awareness.
In me is the power of the Word,
And I share that gift with All.

--Essene Book of Meditations and Blessings
     by Danaan Parry


Carolyn shares:  When Karen shared this blessing with me, I truly felt it as 'a blessing'.  As I read these words, I felt an affirmation of my intention and commitment to open myself to love the truth of what is and my desire to be a catalyst who helps others know the power, peace and sense of well-being which comes with loving the truth.  Reading this blessing, I heard this: There is power in the Word, and this power is a gift.  And I am blessed in sharing this gift.
I left my contemplation time with a deep sense of peace and with hope. To embrace 'power', I think will be a practice, and the coming cycle of Serve Truth, will offer a time for practice.

A Prodigal Goddess Prepares to Serve Truth

To return home,

to walk as prodigal into our own life.

Will we feast on our fatted calf?

Or mete our own justice?

To know the light, we must learn darkness.

We value most, that which is nearly lost.

Treat yourself with kindness.

Turn

and upon turning back,

Welcome yourself with open arms.

Embrace the cycle.

Hug your Goddess.

Greet yourself,

perfect in your imperfection

Originally posted by Sara on cowgirlzen.com

Self Reflection:  My imperfection is my path of learning my perfection as a child of Creator.

Serve Truth Mandala for the Waxing Moon

The Music of Serve Truth. Lisa Kay, 8.5' x 9", sheet music, watercolor, money plant seed cases, scrabble tiles
Copyright, Lisa Kay